This "Green" Post Was Made of Recycled Thoughts

'And', And Nothing More

like getting to the top of a mountain

and expecting a revelation

only to find yourself out of breath

dazzled by the sights

but awaiting an emotion that never comes

like seeing a pretty painting

but wanting a movie

even your daydreaming

suffers from insomnia

in the shadow

of expecting 'and'

when the sentence ends

-JB 07/29/11

As a reader of this continually unfolding manuscript of greatness, I hereby notify you that class is in session.

I've been told that depression runs in my family, and, truth be told, I've seen some evidence to support the assertion.  I must admit, though, I don't really "get" depression, at least not in the way others seem to describe it.  I mean, I understand it cognitively, and I've experienced it intermittently - as have all people.  For me though, it is like a dream.  I'm sad, but I feel disconnected from it until it, eventually, passes.  It doesn't define me and I would distinguish between being depressed, and feeling depressed.

Whatever the source, depression seems generally related to the most basic of philosophical questions - the meaning of life, one's purpose, why am I here.

Let's explore that for a moment.  I exist.

ex·ist - verb

1. to have actual being

2. to have life or animation

3. to continue to be or live

My existence consists of who I am and the actions I take.  Life is not what you make of it. Whoever coined that phrase missed the target.  You are what you make of yourself, life is just what happens - sometimes as a result, sometimes outside of your direct influence. Your inputs and intent matter, the output does not... apart from the effect on your ego.

The point of existence is, therefore, to make one's self. 

"There are many forks in the yellow brick road, but they'll get you to the Emerald City none-the-less." - Munchkin Proverb

Whether you choose the high road or the low road, both will have forks.  We can''t choose when and where we encounter them, but we can choose which direction to go.

Class dismissed.

He Who Shall Be Named, Albeit Generically

"The Man"

villian wrongly named

slander of my own true sex

manly, you are not
- JB 07/25/11

Few have wreaked as much havoc, have engendered such a sense of revulsion, and been so widely looked down on with derision as – The Man.  If truly there is a name written in the stars, they most assuredly read “The Man” - because he either owns them or has enslaved the star people to do his bidding.  Yes, friends, The Man is one dastardly, no-good, has-all-the-connections-so-he-never-loses, straight-up MF’er.

Don’t bother telling him I told you, though, because he won’t believe you.  We’re tight like skinny jeans.

Why is that, you ask?  How could such an upstanding citizen such as myself be so intimately associated with this villain - he who dumps out the last of your milk at night while you lie sleeping, innocently dreaming of a delicious morning bowl of cereal; who steals one of each pair of socks, only to return them to your next load of laundry just after you gave up hope and threw away the other one; who makes your significant other forget to replace the roll of TP when it runs out?

Well, there’s an interesting story behind that, let’s see if I can remember how it goes.  Oh yeah… I remember... it goes something like this:

I’m an even bigger badass!  The end.

Look, I don’t want to take anything away from Darkwing Duck, but if anybody is the headache in the criminal mind –it’s this guy (I’m pointing at myself).  Who is the surprise in your cereal box, the batteries that aren’t included, the wrong number that wakes you at 3 am, the raspberry seed you can’t floss out? Me. I mean, let’s be honest -that cartoon was basically preemptive plagiarism of my life before I lived it.

I know what you’re saying, though: 

"Mr. Black, just looking at you it becomes obvious that you are awesome, but how exactly does this association with The Man prove it?"

First of all, thanks for noticing.  Secondly, I’ll fill you in on a secret – The best way to stick it to The Man is to convince him to pay you to work against his best interests.  That is to say, I’m the chief instigator behind a silent and unannounced mutiny.  Shhh…

Look, all artificial and goofy presentation tactics aside, the best way for most of us to enact meaningful change is to change things from the inside.  Rare is the opportunity to ‘go rogue’ and actually accomplish something.  I know many people who look at the state of the world, and at the institutions that exist, and feel a strong sense of disgust.  I feel that way myself.  The problem, (as I see it), though, is that so many people allow their righteous feelings of frustration to stagnate in a sea of inaction.  It’s hard to figure out how to change systemic problems – because systemic problems are huge, and they don’t derive from a single deficiency.

The way I see it is that action is always best, and any action that isn’t fruitful can be changed when that determination is made.  Beyond that, The Man is either going to have hirelings who make things worse by reinforcing problems… or he can hire me.  

Let’s face it, the systems that are set up, (the ones so many of us feel are used to abuse, misinform, or otherwise oppress), are so effective in doing so because they are utilized by the vast majority of the population… and the people using those systems have the greatest need for change.  By working within the system, you can bring that change directly to them without having to fight for their attention.  From there, it is but a matter of time before they begin to recognize the benefit of the changes (assuming you are right).

I’ll work hard, but I’ll do it with a smile on my face.  I’ll interact with others, but I’ll do it in a way that encourages them towards their own positive action.  I’ll build systems, do tasks, teach others – but always with the goal of creating a more cohesive unit, focused on long-term positive results for humanity as a whole… and, no, not every action or choice that I make will be so clearly imbued with profound implications, but I believe that the truly profound is best hidden in the accumulation of many smaller actions, enacted over a lifetime.